On...change? my life? decisions?

Dear Lifesies, 

      Being home was good. It was hard in some ways because my "home" is no longer 858 Van Nuys street. My home is San Diego and all the people it contains and all the memories it holds. I love the Reinkes (my cousins) and I am VERY thankful for their openness in graciously letting my marmee stay with them and then letting Joel and I crash there when we are home, but it is still not the same. It is still not my house with my immediate family. My Auntie Robin and my mom were talking about how a bunch of the cousins are going to spend the night there on Christmas Eve. I thought it sounded fun but odd...it was not until later that I realized of course we should all spend the night because we need to wake up on Christmas day together. That is when it hit me. I could have cried...the idea of not having Christmas at our old house, not waking up to Bishop traditions just hurts. But this is a season of change, and I have been surprisingly okay with all the change. It makes me glad how well I have dealt with it, I think the Lord is really helping me. And, it helps that I love where I am in Harrisonburg. OH LIFE I am so torn between two sides of the country!!
      Anyway, only today. Only promised today. When the time comes decisions will be made. But for right now I am in Harrisonburg and I am leading a small group and I am (hopefully) graduating in December and I am praying to the Lord about the future but meanwhile trying not to fret too much. 

      One thing I know for sure- I worked at Forest Home over T-gives break and it was WONDERFUL. Just like usual. So lovely to be back with my beloved staff and my wild and adoring CCAs :) We sipped coffee in Chipmunk Corner as we played bananagrams and talked about our current stations in life. We sang songs with Music Papa again, we laughed about old jokes from the summer, we talked about Lauren's big butt, Alex Rae's artsy and free spirit, and of course...that Kelly needs to move back to California...yeah well join the club of people playing tug-o-war about where I should end up haha. But, it doesn't bother me. I feel loved. 

      Anyway Life, the Lord is teaching me a lot and showing me a lot of hard stuff...especially about myself. I just hope it sticks. I do not want my sin to define me. 

Well, better finish(start) a Spanish project and then hit the sack. 

indecisively yours, 

Kelly

p.s.- HOLLER for Christmas season, gonna deck the halls at The Shire and play Christmas music all the timeeeee!! :)